PFLAG Supports Family and Friends of Gays
Offers Guidance when Faith Conflicts with Sexual Orientation
May 17, 2009
Gays and straights working together: supporting each other. Communities celebrating all of its families: working through differences. Families and communities ready to face challenges from a position of strength. This is the vision of Parents Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays. This is the life of its leader, Jody Huckaby, Executive Director.
Huckaby recently spent the weekend with the PFLAG chapter in Omaha, Nebraska. It was his first invitation to a gay prom for teenagers, an invitation he wholeheartedly accepted.
Gay and Straight Students Attend Gay Prom
The all-volunteer PFLAG chapters across the country sponsor a wide range of activities, all with the goal of bringing gay, bisexual, transgender and straight individuals together. Annual gay proms attract students from area high schools, both gay and straight. These students welcome the support of understanding adults. Not all family members are prepared to support a young person who is questioning their sexuality.
PFLAG was created with the recognition that families often experience a fracture when one of their members identifies as gay. The organization has always been a place for family and friends to come together and heal.
For Huckaby, faith and family were intertwined. He grew up in a loving, tight-knit family committed to the practice of Catholic faith in a small community. He was not the first to come out in his family, but he remembers vividly the impact. His brother, Jason, sent a letter home one Christmas, coming out as gay. Their father gathered the family together and read the letter. He then declared that Jason was not allowed to step foot in the house, and certainly not with his gay partner.
This initially had a chilling affect on Jody Huckaby, who was having feelings of his own and was considering the possibility that he was gay. Over the next three years, the issue of having gay children and siblings went from being the untouchable iceberg to the unavoidable topic the family had to face. Of the seven Huckaby children, a total of four came forward and shared that they were gay.
Education on Faith and Sexuality Available
PFLAG provides education to families, including those whose faith is in conflict with news of a gay sibling, child or friend. The Huckabys worked through the stages of initial denial, a sense of loss, a willingness to tolerate, and finally, acceptance. Today, they are a strong, unified family.
“PFLAG is the only national organization that brings gays and straights together to have a combined voice,” said Huckaby.
The Faith Field Guide provides guidance for families of faith in examining the issues of gay persons. It is available at www.pflag.org.
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